The hook

I've posted a rejigged hook over at http://crapometer.blogspot.com/ based on the critique provided there, so I thought I might as well put it here too...

::HOOK BEGINS::

When disgraced clinical psychologist Dr Steven Brady takes the only job he can find, tending the chronics in a closure-bound Manchester mental hospital, he finds the path to redemption more dangerous than he could ever have imagined. Among the patients is Mary Ward, a young woman with a violent past and a talent for knowing things she shouldn't - including the name that stains Brady's conscience. As Mary tells him of the boy who visits her in the night, the boy whose suicide he failed to prevent two years before, Brady slowly accepts what she is: a conduit, a living link between this world and those beyond.

But someone already knows her true nature.

Billy Crawford is a preacher, a messenger of the Lord, a madman with blood on his hands. Why has he befriended Mary's estranged mother? Why has he persuaded her to fight for her daughter's release after all these years? He keeps the secret close to his heart, lest anyone discover the awful thing that cold voice told him to do…

Realising the threat, Brady sees a way to atone for his past - protect Mary at all costs.
A tense paranormal thriller, complete at 90,000 words, CONDUIT explores the boundaries between the mind and spirit, madness and faith, the gifted and the cursed. As it reaches its climax the struggle between Brady and Crawford unleashes the dreadful power within Mary, and no-one is safe - least of all the girl each man sees as his salvation.

::HOOK ENDS::

Any comments welcome.